The Orphan
by bitascull
Summary: Bella is an orphan with a tough past and Billy adopts her. Every house that Bella goes to she is sent back to the adoption agency within a month and expects this to be the same. But when she comes to live with Billy Paul imprints. Full summary inside.
1. Chapter 1

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_Summary: __Bella is an orphan with a tough past and Billy adopts her. Every house  
that Bella goes to she is sent back to the adoption agency within a month and  
expects this to be the same. But when she comes to live with Billy Paul  
imprints on her. What will happen? Will she tell everyone what happened to her?_

**BPOV:**

I was sitting in my room, well they call it a room but I call it a closet I share with three other girls. I just found out I was getting adopted. Apparently they have seen me around here and thought I was perfect, I don't see why they would think that. I just got done packing. Most girls would be excited that they are getting adopted but I've been through this too many times. I usually stay for about a month before I have to go back. I don't think this one will be different.

I am brought out of my thoughts by someone knocking on my door. I look up to see Becky, the person who owns this place. She is the nicest person that I had to stay with while waiting to get adopted. The others would call me names like slut. "Isabella, your new adopted father is here." She says in her high pitched voice. The only thing I don't like about her is that she calls me Isabella instead of Bella.

I just nod my head and grab my small duffle bag. I follow her out my old bedroom's door. We walk down the stairs and into the conference room. The first thing I notice is a giant. I'm not exaggerating either. He had short, sleek black hair. He had to be at least 6'3. He was really tan. I think he they are Indian.

"This is Billy, your new adopted father and his son, Jacob." I flinched when I heard the last name. Jacob. That was the name of the guy I lost my virginity to when I was eight. I looked at the giant, I mean Jacob, to see he was frowning. Crap! I ruin everyone's life. "And this is Isabella." Becky continued.

She called me that again. "It's Bella." I said turning to look at Becky's face. She looked confused. I sighed. "I go by Bella. I've told you that." I said, annoyed.

"I don't see why. Isabella is a lovely name." She said.

"For someone like you, not someone like me." I replied, probably sounding like snobby girl.

She stared at me in shock. I've barley said any words to her since I've been here. Billy cleared his throat awkwardly. I turn to look at them at them. "You ready to go, Bella?" He says. I smile at him calling me Bella. I nod my head. Jacob, I still flinch when I think his name, grabs my bags and heads towards the door. I wave at Becky and follow Billy out the door. We walk out the door of the adoption agency. We walk to a 1986 Volkswagen Rabbit. "A Volkswagen Rabbit?" I say out loud to no one.

"Yup, it's a-" I cut him off.

"A 1986." He looks over at me in shock. "I know a little about cars." I shrug.

"Where'd you learn about cars?" He asks once he helps Billy in the car.

I tense. "I had to get a job at my old adopted parents' house. I made a couple of grand in three weeks." I said stiffly.

"You only stayed for three weeks?" He asks. I nod. "What'd you do with the money?"

Crap! "I gave it to my adopted parents'."

"Why?"

"They made me." I said glaring at him. I saw Billy look at me from corner of my eye.

The rest of the car ride was silent. After about three and a half hours we got to their house, I mean our house. The house was a red color. It was pretty small but it looked homey. I got out of the car and helped Billy. I decided that if I was nice, I might not get to hurt. Every time I got adopted, I would get hurt. I've been without a family since I was six. I don't even remember anything before then. The first time I was adopted, I would always get hit. I stayed there for three months. That was the longest I stayed a place but then my teacher called the cops when she saw slap marks. Ever since then, I would only stay for a month or less because of what they would do.

When we were inside, Billy turned to Jacob. I am actually getting better when I think his name. "Jacob." I flinch a little. Maybe I spoke to soon. "Will you show Bella her room?" He nods and picks up my duffle bag.

He walks up the stairs and turns to his left. He opens the door so I can see a small room, bigger then the closet though, with baby blue walls. He puts my bag down and turns to me and smiles. "My friends and I painted it blue because it's kind of a girl and boys color. We didn't know what color you like. If you don't like it we can change it." He says nervously. They did this all for me? No one has ever done that before.

"I like blue. This room is great," I hesitate before saying, "Jacob." I tried keeping my voice neutral but I don't think I did well.

"Do you hate me or something?" He asks suddenly.

I hesitate. I walk over to the bed and sat down while Jacob stood by the door. "I don't hate you, I just don't like your name." He raises his eyebrow at him. "I lost my virginity to a Jacob." He looks at me in confusion. I stood up and walked over to the door. He took a step back so he was outside the door. "I was eight." I said and slammed the door shut.

A few seconds later, I heard him yell, "You can call me Jake, if you want!" I shake my head and grab my duffle bag. I put the little clothes I have in my new dresser. When I was done, I ran downstairs. I needed to know where the bathroom is before I start crying. I follow the sounds of people and turn into what could be the kitchen.

"Ah, there you are. Are you done packing?" Billy asks. I nod and ignore Jake.

"I was wondering where the bathroom is." I said politely. I was still scared that they'll do something to me.

"Oh. You'll have to share one with Jacob. It's right across from you. Is that alright?" I nod and head back up the stairs. I open my new bedroom door and shut the door. Yes! There is a lock. I lock it and throw myself on the bed.

I can't believe I just told Jake that! This is horrible! He'll know I'm weak. He's probably planning his attack. I sat on my bed crying for how long, I don't know. Finally I got up and unlocked my door. I opened the door hesitantly. I didn't see anyone so I ran into the bathroom and locked the door. I turned on the water from the sink and splashed my face. They couldn't know I was crying. That would just show more weakness.

Once I was sure, you couldn't tell that I was crying, I brushed my fingers through my hair. When I looked to see my hair was in better shape, I open the door and walked out into the hallway. I slowly walked into the kitchen again to see Billy and Jacob sitting at the dinner table.

"There you are, Bella. We were just discussing what we are going to eat for dinner. I was thinking about ordering pizza." Billy said with a friendly smile. I wonder if Jake told him what I said.

"Actually, I can cook for you guys." I said.

"No you do-." I cut him off.

"I want to. Plus it helps me calm down."

"Are you sure?" I nod. "Well, if you really want to but we don't have much food here. We only really have fish."

"I know a few fish recipes." I said shrugging. Billy showed me where everything was. Billy sat at the table reading the newspaper when Jake came in.

"I'm going over to Sam's to tell them I'm not eating over there, okay?" Billy nodded.

I walked over to the table. "Do you eat like a pregnant woman?" I asked trying not to laugh.

"Are you saying I look pregnant?" Jake asks incredulously.

I shake my head. "I'm asking if you eat like your eating for two."

His mouth forms an 'o' shape. "No I eat like I'm eating for four people." He says smiling hugely.

"Alright then. What about you Billy?"

"I eat for two." He says chuckling. I nod my head and go back over by the freezer to start cooking.

I decided to fry the fish. It didn't take long to cook. I cook really fast. When I was putting the food on the table, Jacob and someone else walked in. Billy wheeled in after them. "This smells good, Bella."

"Thanks." I reply.

"Bella this is Sam, Jacob's friend. Sam this is Bella." Billy says.

I try my best to smile at him. Sam just smiles at me.

"Nice to meet you, Bella. I just came to meet you. Jacob came over to tell us you were cooking for them so I decided to come over and meet you."

"Ok…" I said letting my voice trail off.

"It does smell really good." Jacob says sitting down. I nod and start for the stairs.

"Where are you going?" Billy says confused.

"Oh, I'm not hungry." I replied.

"Are you sure? You haven't eaten all day. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine just not hungry." I said trying to smile reassuringly at him. I turn around but stop and turn back around. "If you hear screaming coming from my room tonight, don't worry I'm fine. Nice to meet you, Sam." I said and turning around leaving them confused.

I walked in my bedroom and grabbed my pajamas. I walked to the bathroom with my bathroom supplies. I took a quick shower and changed into my pajamas. I ran out of the bathroom into the hallway into someone. I look up to see Jacob and Sam.

"Sorry." I mumble and start heading to my room.

"Wait." Jacob says. I turn back around. "Why would you be screaming tonight?"

"I have nightmares." I said and slipped into my room. I put my dirty clothes in the hamper next to my dresser. I look at the mirror above the dresser. I sigh.

I am so plain. I have brown curly hair with brown muddy eyes. I'm really white and am 5'4. I don't why anyone would want me at all. I shake my head and go to climb into my new bed. _I hope I don't wake anyone up with my screaming_, was my last thoughts before I fell asleep.

* * *

~dream~

I was sitting in my new bedroom. I was eight years old. This was my second home since I have been putting into a foster home. I first got a new home when I was seven but the person was a mean. My new parents came in. They were really pretty. They both had blond hair and blue eyes but their eyes were a scary icy color.

"Isabella, we are going out of town. We'll be back tomorrow. Listen to Jacob. Do you what he tells you to, okay?" I nod and they left.

I was in my room for the next two hours. Then Jacob came into my room. I looked up at him. He was seventeen. He came down and sat on my bed and just stared at me.

"Do you need something?" I ask politely.

"I need you." He said and pinned me down. He was gripping my arm so tight.

"Let go! You're hurting me!" I screamed. He took one arm off me and ripped my shirt off. While he rapped me, I kept on begging him to stop. When he was done, he got off me and fell asleep with the condom still on. I sat there crying for a few minutes. I finally got off and grabbed my new robe. I ran downstairs and out the door. I stumbled to the neighbors.

They answered the door and looked at me in shock. "Help! I need help!" I screamed.

~end dream~

* * *

I woke up screaming help. Darn! One day I want to be able to sleep without having nightmares.

I got up and noticed I was sweating. I usually don't shower in the morning because my hair will be really wet but I only do when I'm sweating so badly.

I grab my clothes for that day and went into the bathroom. I took the fastest shower ever. I changed my clothes and brushed my hair. I through my pajamas in the dirty laundry and ran in the hall to go downstairs. I hope they have coffee. Usually I don't drink coffee unless it's cappuccino or if I'm really tired which is a lot of times.

When I got downstairs, I saw a bunch of half naked guys in the living room with some girls. "Bella! These are my friends." Jake says.

"Oh. Hi Jake." I notice Sam there too. "Hi Sam." I said nodding to him. He just smiles at me. "Hi everybody." I turn back to Jake. "Do you guys have coffee?"

"You drink coffee?" He asks me sounding incredulous.

"I don't really like regular but I've gotten use to it." I said shrugging.

"The coffee's in the kitchen. You know where the sugar is, right?" I nod. I was about to turn when I saw him. He was gorgeous. He had a caramel complexion. He had the same black hair as Jake except it was shorter and a little spiky. His eyes were a deep brown that I could get lost in. He had both ears pierced. He was staring back at me in awe. I blush. I haven't blushed in a long time. Crap! I turned on my heel and walked in the kitchen to get my coffee.

When I got my coffee, I went and sat down at the kitchen table. A few minutes later, Billy came in with everyone else following him. He smiled at me and got himself some coffee. Jacob sat down next to me while everyone else tried to find a seat. I sat there staring at my coffee. I ignored everyone else around me. "Bella?!" I heard Jake shouting. I looked over at him. "I've been trying to get your attention." I gave him a look that was meant for me to say sorry. "I wanted to introduce to my friends." I nod telling him to go on. "This is Embry, Quil, Quil's girlfriend Claire, Seth, Seth's girlfriend Crystal, Leah, Leah's boyfriend Joe, Jared, his girlfriend Kim, Collin, Brady, Sam's wife Emily, and Paul." He looked at me like I was suppose to do something at Paul, the mega hottie. Wait, did I just say that? What is up with me?

I look up at everyone and say, "Nice to meet you." I look back down at my coffee.

"Brady, Collin and my girlfriend isn't here rught now." Jake says frowning. I nod.

"Do you want to go shopping with us girls? We can get you more clothes." I look and notice Kim said it.

I sigh and reluctantly say, "Sure."

"Great we'll leave once we get a hold of everyone else and you eat." Claire said.

I shake my head. "I'm not hungry." I said shrugging.

"You're not hungry again. You didn't eat yesterday either. Are you fine?" Jake asks.

I notice Paul looking at me with concern all over his face. "Yeah, I'm perfectly fine."

"We'll make sure she eats lunch, won't we?" Claire says.

Crystal nods in aggreement. "I'll go call the rest of the girls." I sigh. Today is going to be long.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for reviewing!**

**I will update again…  
Once u guys review my new story  
(The one I adopted)  
Here it is:**

Previously: "Do you want to go shopping with us girls? We can get you more clothes." I look and notice Kim said it.

I sigh and reluctantly said, "Sure."

"Great we'll leave once we get a hold of everyone else and you eat." Claire said.

I shook my head. "I'm not hungry." I said shrugging.

"You're not hungry again. You didn't eat yesterday either. Are you fine?" Jake asks.

I notice Paul looking at me with a concerned look. "Yeah, I'm perfectly fine."

"We'll make sure she eats lunch, won't we?" Claire says.

Crystal nods in agreement. "I'll go call the rest of the girls."

I sighed.

Today is going to be a very long day.

BPOV:  
While Crystal called the rest of the girls, I listened to the guys talking about their girlfriends. Embry was dating this girl name Mia. She was half Puerto Rican and half Quilette. She loves volleyball and soccer. Her favorite animal is a wolf. He also warned me that she has obsessive shopping compulsive disorder, which basically means that she loves to shop and drags anyone who is willing (and those who aren't) to go shopping .

Collin told me about his girlfriend, Sarah. Apparently she's really sporty. She loves soccer, softball, football, and tennis. She doesn't like shopping that much but she'll go. She's really competitive too especially when she plays sports.

After Collin, Brady told me about his girlfriend, Jaslene. She loves playing video games. Her favorite video game is Halo. She can beat anyone at guitar hero too. She hates shopping but she goes if people don't make her buy stuff and force her to wear them. Her favorite color is green and she loves playing pranks.

When he was done telling me about Jaslene, we sat there in silence. I was expecting Jacob to talk about his girlfriend but he didn't. I looked over at him and saw him smiling off in space. After a couple of minutes, he looked over at me. "What?"

"I was wondering if you were going to explain your wonderful girlfriend." I said

"Why do you want to know?"

"I don't. I just want to know her name so I don't have to call her 'hey you'."

"Oh. Her name is Celene. She's too perfect to explain." He says, smiling.

That brought me into a flashback.  
~Flashback~  
It was my third day at my new house. I was sitting at the dining room table with my new brother. I was eating my cereal. When I was done, I stood up and washed my dishes. When I was done I turned around to see Jacob standing close to me, smiling.

"You know you are too perfect." He said moving closer to me. I started getting scared so I nodded and ran upstairs to my room. When I got there I remember I forgot something down there. I slowly walked back down.

When I was on the bottom of the stairs, I heard my new mom and dad talking. I only caught glances of sentences. "…perfect for each other." I heard my new dad say.

"…have beautiful kids together."

The last sentence I heard perfectly. "They are going to have fun while we are gone."

~End Flashback~

They knew what he was going to do!! I can't believe people would do that to children. That was so horrible! Wait! They told the police they didn't know! They lied while their kid went to jail! "Bella?!" I heard someone scream.

"What?" I said looking around. I noticed everyone looking at me.

"I've been trying to get your attention since I told you Celene is too perfect." Jake said with a concerned look on his face

"Sorry. I was having a flashback moment, I guess." I said shrugging nonchalantly, even if I was any but.

"Oh. Ok, the rest of girls are here. Are you sure you don't want something to eat." Sam asked

"Yup. Positive. Don't worry about me. I'll see you later." I said ignoring everyone and walking to the door.

I stood outside, waiting for the rest of the girls. They finally came outside with the guys. I sigh. I just want to get away from everyone. "I know how you feel." I heard someone say next to me. I jump.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. " I look and see one of the guys smiling at me, Paul I think was his name

He wasn't sorry. He probably likes me being scared.

"Sure you are." I say back my voice coming out harsh and guarded

From the corner of my eye, I saw him frown. "But I know how you feel." He stated persistently  
Like he knew, nobody ever knew how I felt.

"How do I feel?" I retorted

"Left out." He said

"Sorry but you're wrong. I'm just impatient. I don't care that I don't have anyone. I don't care

what they do." I said my voice came out harsher than I intended and for a second I felt bad about it until I caught myself. Why should I feel bad about being mean to him when everybody I ever thought cared about me did horrible things to me

I see him frown some more. "But don't you feel lonely sometimes?" he asked

I shake my head.

"I don't need anyone to survive Paul" I said

"Well sorry for taking up your time." He says and walks away.  
When I look at him, it seems like he wants to cry. Great! I ruined another person's life! Every where I went, I ruined people's lives

A tap on my shoulder alerted me of someone.

I turned around slowly

"Sorry." Kim said.

"For what?" I said confused.

"For making you wait. We just get caught up in the moment." Kim said blushing a delicate pink color

"Oh, it's alright. I just get impatient." I said trying to smile, probably only achieving a grimace

"You're not mad at us for making out and being all lovey-dovey?" Kim asked

"Why would I be?" I asked shrugging

"Paul is like that sometimes." She said. "What do you think about Paul?"

"He seems pretty cool, I guess." I said

She nodded her head.

She then started walking toward her car, waving me to follow her. When I get closer, I can see a Plymouth Duster. The color was a vibrant orange

"Cool car. I love the color." I said

Jared nodded his head and put his arm around Kim's waist proudly. "Yup, it's a-"

I cut him off. "A Plymouth Duster. I know."

He stares at me in shock for a couple of minutes. "What year is it?"

I look over at it for a couple of seconds. Assessing it, "A 1971."

"That's good! You should help us build a car sometime." Jacob says this time.

"Sure." I said shrugging, not meeting anyone's eye. At my last home, they made me get a job. If I didn't give them the money I made then they'd beat me. The last night I was in my home, I worked extra time. When I was about to leave, my boss came in and grabbed me from behind. He tried to rape me but once he saw the bruises he let me go and made me promise not to tell anyone. I did and the next day my adopted parents were arrested. I was scared that bad memories were going to unearth if I fixed a car.

We somehow managed to fit everyone in only three cars. Apparently the guys were going too. I was in a care with Jake, Celene, and Paul. We were in Jake's rabbit. I love his car. It was very smooth smoothly. It was also very comfy.

The car ride to Port Angeles took about an hour. When we pulled into the mall, I was surprised by how big it actually was. We all stepped out of the car. It seemed that Paul wanted to do something but he decided against it.

I wonder what's up with him.

When we all started walking towards the mall, Paul stopped me. I looked at him, confused and a bit scared of what he was going to do.

"I have to ask you something." He stated.

"Ok." I said slowly.

"Do you like me?" he says bluntly

What?!?!

"I think you are pretty cool." I say while blushing.

I hate my blush. Usually I ignore my blush.

He looks at me before breaking into a full blown smile.

"Thanks, I think you are cool too!" I smile shyly at him and start heading back to the mall where everyone was waiting for me.

I have a feeling that the rest of the day is going to go to be weird. I just know it.

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	3. Chapter 3

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The ages (roxierockz21):

Bella- 16=Paul-18

Jacob-17=Celene-16

Kim-16= Jared-17

Leah-18= Joe-18

Sam-20=Emily-19

Brady-15=Jaslene-15

Collin-15 =Sarah-15

Seth-15= Crystal- 16

Embry-17= Mia-17

Quil-17= Claire-16(He imprinted when she wasn't a little kid)

*If I forgot someone please tell me. Also if you don't like the ages then who cares. Deal with it. Sorry for being mean.

_Previously: "I have to ask you something." He stated._

"_Ok." I said slowly._

"_Do you like me?" he says bluntly_

_What?!?!_

"_I think you are pretty cool." I say while blushing. _

_I hate my blush. Usually I ignore my blush. _

_He looks at me before breaking into a full blown smile._

"_Thanks, I think you are cool too!" I smile shyly at him and start heading back to the mall where everyone was waiting for me._

_I have a feeling that the rest of the day is going to go to be weird. I just know it._

**BPOV:**

When we caught up with the rest of the group, they were all beaming. I looked at them confused and ignored them. When we were walking, I realized everyone was looking at us with wide eyes. I look down. I hate being the center of attention.

The shopping wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I only got a 10 shirts that we on sell and 5 pants. After we were done shopping, we went to the food court. When we bought our lunch, we went to a big table. I noticed a lot of girls staring at the table. I looked at the girls at the table and noticed they were hanging off of their boyfriend. I looked at the girls' at the other table's and saw them looking at Paul with dark eyes. I've been raped enough to know what that look means.

I sigh and look down at my food. I don't know why I am mad at the girls looking at him. He's not even mine. I don't want him mine. Or do I? This is so confusing. I shake my head. I can feel someone's eye on my back. I turn around and see the last person I want to see. My old boss.

I stare at him with wide eyes. Shock and fear run through me. What was he doing here? He lives in Michigan. That's where I lived until my "parent's" were arrested. They thought they should move me away from that state. But why was he here? He smiles at me. He points over towards the bathroom. I guess I should go or he might make a scene. I turn back toward everyone at the table.

"I have to go to the bathroom." I mumble, not meeting there eyes.

"Do you want me to go with you?" Kim asks.

I shake my head. "No that's alright. I want to be alone right now."

I get up from my seat and walk slowly towards the hallway that leads to the bathroom. I turn into the hallway and look for him. Out of nowhere I get grabbed into one of the bathrooms. The person slams me against the door. I look up and see my old boss. Kira. I look at him with fear.

"Did you tell anyone?!?" He hisses at me. I shake my head quickly. "Good." He says dropping to the ground. "We don't know each other. I'm going back to Michigan." He says and pushes me out of the way. He walks out the door while I sit there on the ground. Finally I stand up and walk over to the mirror. I look at my neck where he grabbed me and see a bruise forming. I sigh. I'm so happy that I brought my make-up with me. No matter where I go, I make sure I have make-up.

When I'm done with my make-up, I head towards the door and open it. I look in the small hallway to make sure no one was there. I close the door quietly and see that he pulled me into a guy/girl restroom. I walk slowly down the hallway with my head down.

I walk to the table and sit down. "Bella?" I hear Jake say. I look up slowly. "Aren't you going to eat." I look down at my food and realized I haven't eaten anything. I take small bites. I don't know what will happen if I eat to much.

I decided to eat half. When I was done, I realized I was the last one. I blushed and looked down. I was about to pick up my tray and saw it was gone. I looked up and saw that Paul grabbed it. I look at him confused but all he does is shrug and go throw it away. When the guys came back, we decided to leave.

I felt someone next to me. I look over at the person. Paul. I notice he's glaring at something. I look down and notice it's my neck. I look away quickly and silently curse myself. From the corner of my eye I see Paul shaking a little. Jake comes up to him and pulls him away. I can see them whispering something to everyone else. I sigh.

PUT LINE HERE

When we got home I went straight upstairs with my new clothes. I put my clothes in my dresser and closet. When I was done, I went downstairs because Billy called me. When I got to the living room, I saw Billy watching TV with everyone else. When I entered Billy looks up at me and saw him quickly look at my neck.

Billy clears his throat. "You'll be starting school next week. It's a new year. Everyone here goes to La Push High except Sam, Emily, Leah and Joe. So you don't have to worry." I nod my head a little surprised. "School starts on Tuesday. You should be there by 8:00 alright?" I nod and go back upstairs.

I lay on my bed starring at the ceiling. After a while, I let the darkness take me.

I wake up to someone shaking me. I open my eyes, surprised I didn't dream. I looked over to see who was shaking me. Jake. I flinch away from him. He backs away with his hands up in surrender. "Sorry. Sorry. I just wanted to let you know we ordered pizza and its here." I nod and he leaves.

I get up and brush my hair without looking in the mirror. I walk slowly down stairs and see everyone already eating. "Bella, I made you a plate." Emily says. I smile at her and walk over to her. I eat my pizza slowly. I only ate about three quarters of it. I went over to the sink and washed it.

I was about to head upstairs when Paul stopped me. "What happened to your neck?" I didn't miss the anger in his voice.

I decided to play dumb. "I don't know." I said not meeting anyone's eyes.

"Don't lie!" He yells. I flinch away.

I sigh. "At times like this, I wish I actually did die when I tried to. " I mumble while shaking my head. I look up and notice everyone staring at me in shock. I turn around and run up the stairs without tripping. I run in my room and slam the door shut. I lock it and pause a moment to thank god that it had a lock. When I was done, I slid down the door and broke down crying.

After a couple of minutes, I got up with tears silently falling down my cheeks. I went to my bathroom necessities and grabbed my razor. I cut myself. On. The Vein. I cry out in pain and fall down on the floor. I let the darkness take me in.

**Here ya go!**

**Hope you liked it.**

**I cried when I was writing the last part. **

**It's really sad. **

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	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for all the reviews! I got a lot of questions and I know a lot of you hate me but I swear she is not CUTTER! That was her first time. That's why it hurt so much. By the way, when she was talking about dieing. She meant she tried starving herself but she would always get saved. That's also why she doesn't eat much. She's scared she might throw up or something. Here's the answer's to the questions:**

**Ich liebe dich nichts****: Renee and Charlie were murdered. They caught the guy because Bella was a smart kid and called the cops. She doesn't remember anything and the guy died because he wouldn't freeze. Bella is 16 because I thought she should be younger then Jacob. I didn't want her to be too old. I thought she might be able to stay with them longer. Billy is 42. He had Jacob at the age of 25. Jake's mom died in a car accident when Jacob was 3. Jake doesn't remember her much. Rachel and Rebecca do exist but won't be in the story much. They won't get imprinted on or visit. They wanted to get out of La Push because they get reminders of their mom. They might call or something. Billy adopted Bella because he missed having a girl around. Bella won't be a wolf because she isn't even Quilette. It would just be random.**

_**Who_me**__**?**_**: I am really sorry that I ruined this story. But don't worry this was a one time thing! Don't worry!**

**Becca Ariel Black:**** No one got to her because everyone was outside. Paul and pretty much everyone freaked out and they had to phase but you'll see soon enough.**

***Sorry if I skipped a question. Please tell me!**

**PPOV: (Paul!)**

After my sweet Bella ran up the stairs, I started shaking. I can't believe she said that. Everyone ran out the door and into the forest once we heard her door slam shut. When we got into the forest, we all exploded into horse size wolves. There were thousands of thoughts in my head. They were all jumbled up.

_HEY! Quiet down, now!_ Sam yelled in his alpha voice.

Everyone quieted down at once but they weren't happy about it. _I can't believe that she said that! _Jake yells. _I can't believe you yelled at her too! _Jake turns to me. Immediately I feel guilty. I yelled at her. I freaking yelled at her! I can't believe it!

_Paul calm down! _Jacob and Sam yelled together. I calmed down but wasn't happy about it.

"You guys come here, quickly!" Billy yelled.

We quickly phased and ran to the edge of the forest. When we got closer to Jake's, we could smell blood. The first thing I thought of was Bella. I ran faster and faster. When I got inside, I ran up the stairs to her room with everyone behind me. I tried opening the door but it was locked. I knocked the door back and saw a sight I never wanted to see.

My Bella, my angel, was lying on the ground with blood coming out of her left arm and a razor in her right hand. I ran towards her and picked her up. I could hear her ragged breathing. I ran out of the room and pushed the guys away. I ran down the stairs and hopped in the car, holding Bella. Jake hopped in the driver seat and started the car.

All the way to the hospital, I looked at Bella. Her arm was still bleeding a little bit. I decided to take my shirt off. I put my shirt on her arm to stop the bleeding. After a couple of minutes I looked down at the cut and saw she cut her vain. It was deep but not that deep. We pulled up into La Push Hospital.

I ran in the doors forgetting about Jacob. The nurse at the station saw me and quickly called one of the doctors down. Dr. Jennifer came and tried to grab my angel. I held on to her tighter. "You need to let go of her so I can help her." She said. I sighed but let her take her away from me. The guys and I went into the waiting room waiting for her. I hope she is alright.

**BPOV:**

I've been in the darkness forever. I can't believe I did what I did. All I can think of is Paul. I am going to miss him while I'm dead. I hope he'll remember me. All I felt was numbness until I felt pressure on my left arm. The pressure was only there for a second.

I felt like I was floating. I was floating in peaceful darkness. I liked it there. I couldn't feel anything. It was a nice feeling.

_Beep Beep! _What is that?! It needs to go away! I miss the peaceful darkness. Finally I gave up and tried to open my eyes. At first I couldn't it felt like an elephant was sitting on them. I tried a couple of times before I could open my eyes. When I opened them, all I saw was a bright light. Where was I? Am I going to heaven? I blinked a few times before I could see well. I looked around and saw I was in a hospital. Why was I here?

"Bella? Bella!" I heard someone yelling. I looked over to the chair next to my bed and saw Paul. I flinched automatically. He looked at me with pain in his eyes. I look down at my hands, ashamed. I don't why I was ashamed but I was.

"I'm sorry." I whispered lowly.

"Why are you sorry?" Paul said in an anger tone. I flinched back, scared he might do something. "I'm so sorry. Did I scare you? I am such an idiot!"

I looked up at him to see him pulling his hair. _Why does he even care? _I thought.

"Why do I care?" I said that out loud? "I care about you more than you know." He paused for a second before opening his mouth. Before he could say anything the door opened. I looked over to see the last person I wanted to see.

**Who should it be? I have no idea who it should be. Remember if you have any questions please ask me. I want to get 100 reviews. The 100****th**** reviewer will get a sneak peak! Thank you all for reading! I hope you guys liked it. You guys rock!**

**~bitascull**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry it took so long.**

**I want to thank my beta for this story:**

**Cullen-Madness101**

**Check out her stories!**

**I want to get 200 reviews!**

**Everyone who reviews on **_**this**_** chapter will get a sneak peak.**

**But if I get 200 reviews!**

**If not I'll still be happy with the reviews.**

**If you have questions, please ask.**

**Thanks to the reviews!**

_Previously: "Why do I care?" I said that out loud? "I care about you more than you know." He paused for a second before opening his mouth. Before he could say anything the door opened. I looked over to see the last person I wanted to see._

**BPOV:**

I froze. It can't be! I thought he was in jail! He can't be here. How'd he find me?! What is he doing here? I am so dead.

"Bella!" I flinch from his voice. It sounds the exact same from last time. Rough and breaking glass. That's what I hear when he talks. "I am so glad that you're okay! I broke out of jail just for you. I didn't know where you were but I fixed that by breaking into that adoption agency and took your file. I went to that house and heard saw some dude carrying you to a car. I followed them here." He said. I could detect the anger in his voice. Wait did he say he broke out of jail?!

I scoot up on the bed trying to get as far as I can away from him. I look over at Paul, remembering he is there. On my hands on accord, I grab his hands. That's when I realize I am shaking. What am I going to do?

"Bella, honey, are you okay?" Paul whispers in a soothing voice. I calm down a little bit.

"Bella what is this!?" Jacob, the guy who took my virginity, yells. I flinch back. "I thought you loved me. I was in jail for about eight years because I love you! And here you are fucking this guy." My hand starts shaking more and I realize it wasn't me. I look over at Paul and see him shaking like crazy. I rub my fingers against his hand trying to calm him down. "Look at me!" He yells.

Paul turns around and looks at him. Surprisingly, he's calm but he's too calm. "Don't talk to her like that." He says in a deadly calm voice.

"Shut up." Jacob says, glaring at Paul. I flinch from his cold glare. He turns towards me. "Aw. I'm sorry, honey." He says to me.

I break. I won't let him lead my life anymore. What can I do? I have to attract attention. I open my mouth wide and scream. "!!!!!!!!" They both look at me, startled. I scream again. "AHHHHHHH!!!"

"Shut up!" Jacob yelled.

I stop, looking at him in fright. What was I thinking?

"What's happening?!" I hear people yelling. I look towards the door and see everyone from Billy's house. I meet Jake's eyes. My eye's flicker over to Jacob and back to his eyes. Understanding dawns in his eyes. He whispers something to Jared. Jared turns around and heads down the hall.

A few minutes later he returns with security guards. One looked about 25 with really long black hair. His hair looked like it hasn't been washed in a few days. The other one was around 40 who was bald looking.

The old one looked at Jacob for a few minutes before recognition came in his eyes. "Hey, you're that guy who escaped from jail." Everyone looked at Jacob shocked and fright all over their faces. The two security guards come forward and grab Jacob. The younger one speaks on a walkie-talkie quietly.

"Let go of me!!!" Jacob yells. I flinch.

"Bella it's okay." I hear Paul whisper. I look over at him to see him looking at me in concern. I look away quickly to see more guards dragging Jacob away.

"Don't worry. We called the police and they are on their way. They're going to keep him here until they get a hold of the jail guards from the jail he was at." The youngest security guard said.

Billy cleared his throat. "Uh… we're going to go back in the waiting room. Glad to see you're better, Bells." He said. Everyone reluctantly left except Paul.

I looked over at Paul embarrassed. I looked down at my hands and realized I was still holding his hand. I blushed and tried pulling my hand from his. He only held onto my hand tighter.

"Sorry." I whisper.

"About what?" Paul said in a hard voice. I tried not to flinch.

"About Jacob, I don't… he just brings back memories I want to forget and leave them in the past!." My voice shook slightly from the shock.

"Who?" He said, confused.

"The guy that was here. It was my entire fault." I said crying. I ruin everyone's life. I don't know why anyone would ever want me. Even if it was for a punching bag. I felt the bed sink in. I tense immediately. Warms arms wrap around my tense body.

"Ssh, honey, its okay. You didn't do anything wrong, Bells." Paul whispers to me. I continue to cry softly but I relax, his touch was so different it made me feel safe.

When I finally stop crying, I look up at Paul, embarrassed. "Sorry for crying like that." I mumble.

"Hey now, it's not your fault. Who was that guy?" I tense immediately. I'm not ready for Paul to look at me differently. "You don't have to tell me." He adds quickly.

"I'm just not ready."

"But you told our Jacob." He says in a slightly hurt voice.

"By accident. I didn't mean to tell him but they have the same name. He wandered why I always flinched when someone said his name and I just told him without realizing it. Please don't be mad." I grab hold of his shirt so he didn't leave.

"It's okay, honey. I'm not mad at you. I'm here for you." Paul whispers sweetly to me.

I look up at him and I smile a small smile. I realize how close are heads are. I can feel his breath on my face and for once I'm not scared. I can feel Paul freeze. I look up into his eyes. His eyes full of concern. I lean forward and press my lips against his.

_Why am I kissing him? _I thought. Can I really trust him? I lean back a little bit and look at him and I _really_ look at him.

I lean forward and press my lips firmer against his. He stays frozen for a minute before he starts moving his lips with mine. It was the best feeling ever. He tasted like warm milk chocolate with a hint of mint.

I wanted to taste more. I stuck my tongue on his bottom lip wanting him to open and respond to me. He finally gave in and opened. He tasted much better. I moaned into his mouth giving into the sensation of him, getting lost in him. After my moan his hand cradled behind my neck and the other around my waist holding me to him, I wrapped my arms around his neck. As we pulled to each other, I felt myself getting up onto my knees so I could get closer. I soon found we both couldn't stop and he pulled me onto his lap, I could feel his warm body temperature, the feeling of his chiselled body. When I finally realised I needed my breath I pulled away, only then did I realise how much that kiss affected the both of us.

I pulled away and mumbled. "Sorry." I can't believe I did that. What was I thinking kissing him? And how did I end up in his lap? This is horrible.

"You don't need to be sorry." Paul said. His arm tightening around me. Wait, his arm? His arm is around me?! I tense immediately. I feel his arm move away from me. I look up to see hurt across his face before a blank look masks it.

"I'm so sorry." I said rolling on my side away from him.

The bed moves again. I look over to see him standing next to the bed with a blank look on his face still. "I'm going to go out to the waiting room and have the guys leave you alone. You've been through a lot. I'll see you later." He says and walks out.

When he's gone, I lie back down and start crying. Why do I have to ruin everything? I cry until I fall asleep where the demons attack.


	6. READ! URGNET!

You don't know how sorry I am that I haven't updated in months. I have been having a really hard time and still am. I know you might think I am making up excuses but I'm not. I've tried writing but it didn't work out. Now you can skip this part if you want to the bold. I am still having a really hard time but I'm trying to move on. I hope once I get back into it I'll get better. School is about to start for me so it might take me a long time to write regularly. It just depends on my classes. I am sorry once again.

**I'm going to start slow and work on one story right now. There's a poll on my profile and I would like you to choose which story. If I know where to begin in the story, I will update it soon. If not then I'll try my best to do it soon. So please do the poll as soon as possible. I want to start writing! Thank you and sorry again.**

AND CauseILikeEmHot WON MY CONTEST!


	7. Chapter 7

I know I haven't updated in for a long time but the Author's note tells it all. I really am sorry. So far this story is in the top for the poll. But I am thinking about updating some others too. **My stories might be different. I am sorry if you don't like them anymore but I've changed and my stories might too. I really do hope you still like them. Thank you all for reading. If it weren't for you guys I would have given up. Thank you all **

_I smile on the outside_

_But I'm dying on the inside_

_But he can see through my smile_

_He can see through me._

_But I already ruined it._

By: Me

_Previously: BPOV:_

_"You don't need to be sorry." Paul said. His arm tightening around me. Wait, his arm? His arm is around me? I tense immediately. I feel his arm move away from me. I look up to see hurt across his face before a blank look masks it so I couldn't see the expression of sadness, but I knew it was there._

_"I'm so sorry." I said rolling on my side away from him._

_The bed moves again. I look over to see him standing next to the bed with a blank look on his face still. "I'm going to go out to the waiting room and have the guys leave you alone. You've been through a lot. I'll see you later." He says and walks out._

_When he's gone, I lie back down and start crying. Why do I have to ruin everything? I cry until I fall asleep where the demons attack they never rest it's like they wait for me to fall asleep I have no peace._

Paul's Point of View:

I walk out of the room and sigh heavily. I make my legs move after I hear Bella start to cry. I couldn't go back in there. I really thought she was opening up to me. She was the one who made the first move. I let her take the lead but in the end she was still scared of me. What's wrong with me? Why is she so scared of me? Why does she have to hide secrets from me? Why can't she open up?

"Is everything okay?" Jacob's voice interrupts my thoughts. I blink a few times and realize that I was in the waiting room. When did I get here?

"What do you mean by okay?"

"You look sad and in pain." He said in a serious tone.

"Ok I was comforting her because she thought I was going to be mad at her and leave. Then she kissed me and at first I stayed frozen, too scared to move, but finally I gave in and kissed her back. When she pulled away she apologized to me. I comforted her again but when I tightened my arm around her, she tensed up. Why is she scared of me? I don't understand. I thought we were making progress." I sighed sadly, trying not to cry. I will NOT cry in front of the pack.

"Calm down, Paul. You just have to be patient. She'll come around. She's been through a lot. Don't worry." He said in a soothing way. Since when did I need to be soothed? Imprinting is making me a wimp.

I opened my mouth to reply but was cut off from a blood curling scream. I bolted towards Bella's room. Please not again...

Bella's Point of View:

_I walked through my new family's door, knowing I was going to be in trouble. Why does everyone do this to me? Does anyone care about me? Did my REAL parents even care? Will anyone ever care? I sigh as I hear stomps coming from the living room._

"_Where have you been you ugly brat?" My new father says, slurring his words._

"_I uh I-" I said stuttering over my words. I always sucked at lying. He couldn't know the truth. He would kill me if he knew that a teacher wanted to talk to me about bruises I forgot to cover up. _

"_SHUT UP!" He yelled as his fist connected with my face. "You stupid useless whore! No one cares about you. Your own parents didn't even want you!" He said kicking me in the ribs. "Now you're really going to pay!" He started unzipping his pants. No not again! I'm only 11. This cant be happening to me again. _

_I could feel tears falling down my face as I begged for him not to. "Please don't! I'll do anything please." I said trying to fight back. _

"_FREEZE!" I hear someone say as I scream as loud as I could._

END~

I bolted up from lying down, feeling the tears falling down my face. Why me? Why couldn't I have a regular life?

"Bella? Are you okay? Please be okay…" Huh? Who's that? What's going on?

I open my eyes. Paul? When did he get here? I thought he left me… "I would never leave you." I said that out loud? "Yes you did." I look at him with wide eyes. "Don't worry. I promise I won't ever leave you. I promise." I look in his eyes to see sincerity. Why did I freak out when his arm was around? "I'm here for you. Can I lay down with you?" I nod and look towards the door to realize everyone else must have come with him. I scoot over so there's room for him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"N-no" I stuttered. I don't want him to look at me differently.

"Are you sure? You know you can talk to me about anything, right? No matter what. I'm here for you."

"Why do you care so much?" I blurted out before I could stop myself.

"I can't explain it right now. But I care more than you'll ever know."

I study him for a minute before I move closer to him and hug him awkwardly. He freezes for a minute before putting his arm around him. "Thank you. You're the best."

"Thank you, honey." He replies. He starts shifting like he's about to get up.

"Don't! You promised me you wouldn't leave me!" I said grabbing onto him.

"It's ok honey. I'm not going to leave. Do you want me to stay here on the bed?" He asks gently. I nod, not meeting his eyes. "You can go back to sleep if you want."

I shake my head quickly. "I don't want to sleep." I mumble.

"Okay. How about we ask each other questions?" He says unsurely. I nod. "I'll go first… How many boyfriends have you had?"

I tense up for a minute before saying, "None." I look at him to see him hiding a smile. Why would he be happy about that? "Favorite color?"

"Chocolate brown." He says, smiling softly.

"Me too!" I blurted out before I could stop myself. I blushed to myself.

"That's good." He smiles. "Why haven't you dated before?"

"Um… I never was in a place for long. And I guess guys never really liked me."

"Then they were crazy. I don't know why anyone wouldn't like you." He shakes his head in disbelief. "Oh well. At least we have you now. You should go to sleep. You need your rest to get better."

"Are you going to leave?" I said trying to keep the worry out of my voice.

"Not if you don't want me too." I shake my head, groggily. "Good." I hear him say before I slip in darkness.

**Hoped you guess like it! Sorry it took so long to write. I would have updated earlier this week but my computer was messed up. And I know this chapter is boring and pretty sucky. But I got writers block at the end of the chapter. So tell me what you think pretty please. Thanks to my beta reader: **_**CULLEN-MADNESS 101**_** Keep on voting for what story to update! (: **

**~bitascull**


	8. editing

So I was reading through my stories and I've decided that I'm going to edit them. I don't know which story I am going to start with but once I'm done, I'll delete this author's note. I'll still work on upcoming chapters so no worries. I just thought I'd tell you guys. **I am going to set up a new poll so if you have voted you can vote again and I'm going to go off of those votes for updating. Continue to vote! Thank you all and review my stories please! (: You guys are all wonderful! Peace out!**

**~bitascull**


	9. Chapter 9

I'm updating again! I don't think it was that long ago that I did but I can't remember… I've updated all my stories and I'm pretty proud of myself. This is kind of my release from the world I live in. But of course I can't really write much. Thanks to my beta reader _**Cullen-Madness 101**_**Anyway… I hope you guys like this! Please tell me what you think and any ideas you might have for me. Thank you all! (:**

_Why do I do this to people?_

_Play with their mind?_

_It gives their hopes up_

_I have to stop this._

_It's now or never…_

By: Me

_Previously:_

_"That's good." He smiles. "Why haven't you dated before?"_

_"Um… I never was in a place for long. And I guess guys never really liked me."_

_"Then they were crazy. I don't know why anyone wouldn't like you." He shakes his head in disbelief. "Oh well. At least we have you now. You should go to sleep. You need your rest to get better."_

_"Are you going to leave?" I said trying to keep the worry out of my voice._

_"Not if you don't want me too." I shake my head, groggily. "Good." I hear him say before I slip in darkness._

**BPOV:**

I woke up to warmth. Why am I so warm? Then everything came flooding back to me. Oh no! The nightmare, the questions, me asking him to stay… I sat up so quickly, waking Paul up in the process. He looked up at me confused before realization sunk in. He quickly moved his arm away from me and looked away but not before I saw the look of hurt in his eyes. I hurt him again… I made him feel so unwanted... no one would ever want damaged goods... he would never want me.

He made a move to get up but I quickly grab onto his arm. My heart doesn't want him to go but my mind is freaking out. For once I'm going to ignore my mind. He looked at me confused. I shake my head and pull him gently so he's not in the position he was in. I slowly lay back down.

"You promised me you wouldn't leave me." I whisper as I move onto my side so I could see him. I have to start to let people in, it's the only way I am ever going to be able to move on. They're different. I can tell. They won't hurt me. Any of my old foster families would have left me there to die after what I did to myself. They didn't.

He looks down at me with a look of hope in his eyes. "I did and I don't break promises." I nod and move closer to him. I slowly put my head in the crook of his neck and sigh. He freezes for a minute before he puts his head on top of mine, hesitating wondering what my reaction would be. I can smell his musky scent. I don't know why I'm being like this. I just feel the need to be close to him. I don't want to hurt him anymore. I don't know how I hurt him but I know I am.

After a couple of minutes, I pull back a little. "I'm sorry if I'm crowding you." I didn't even think about if he wanted me to be this close.

"You can never crowd me." He smiles down at me. How could I ever be so scared of him? I have to tell him… at least some of it... how would he react... would he see me different?

"I need to tell you some things." I say not looking him in the eyes; I can't look him in the eyes.

"You don't have to tell me anything. I'm not going to make you, Hun."

I sighed. "I have to. You at least deserve an explanation of whom," I paused, "Jacob is."

"Only if you want to…" I looked into his worried eyes but I saw a hint of curiosity, he wanted to know but he was willing to let me tell him only if I wanted to.

"You deserve to know… But do you think you can tell the others. I don't think I'll be able to tell the story again in a long time."

"I will. Don't worry."

"Also don't try to get angry like you did before. It scared me a little bit." I whispered the last part hoping he didn't hear but of course he did.

"Awe I'm sorry honey! I didn't mean to. I'll try my best!" His voice sounded so sad and lost. I nod and sit up so my back is against the wall.

"It's okay." I take a deep breath. "I was eight years old and in my second foster home. I knew something was up. There were little hints. I had a 'brother' and his name was Jacob. He was about 18 years old. After being there for a few weeks, Jacob started hitting on me. I didn't know that at the time of course. Then a few weeks later, my 'parents' came into my room telling me that they were leaving and Jacob was going to watch me. A couple of hours he came into my room… and… and…" My body shook with sobs. I felt an arm circle around my body.

"Ssh it's okay, honey." Paul whispered in a soothing voice. After a couple of minutes I calmed down.

"I'm sorry." I whisper. He probably thinks I'm insane.

"Don't be. It's not your fault!"

I nod. "I want to finish the story." I take a deep breath. I can do this. "He… raped me. Afterwards he just got off of me and fell asleep. I just sat there crying until I got enough strength to move. I put on my robe and ran to my neighbors." I started crying again. Now he'll look at me different. I started crying harder. He'll leave me. Those only made me cry harder.

"It's okay honey." What…? Why is he comforting me? This boy is confusing me…

After I finally stopped crying, I looked up at him. He was looking down at me with concern in his eyes. "I'm sorry for crying like that." At that moment, I realized he was shaking a little bit. "You're shaking." Immediately he stopped.

"Sorry… Don't say sorry. Ever again." He says fiercely. "You shouldn't be sorry about any of this. None of it is your fault. I don't like hearing you apologize." I nod; surprised that he was acting this way. I think he knew because he said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to act this way. I just care so much about you and I hate it when you beat yourself up about something that isn't your fault. You okay?" I nod, not meeting his eyes. "Don't hide your eyes from me, please. I hate not seeing your face. Please don't be mad either. I didn't mean to be rude or scare you. God, I am so sorry." I finally looked up at his face to see remorse. Now I know how he feels when I apologize so much.

"Paul it's okay. I'm fine. Please don't apologize." He looks down at me and sighs. "I'm tired and you look tired too. Can we just go to sleep?" He nods his head quickly. "And can you… hold me? Please? You don't have to if you don't want to. You just keep the nightmares away and you keep me warm and… will you?" I can't believe I just asked him that. He probably thinks I'm clingy.

"Of course!" He says, happily. "C'mon let's go to sleep." I roll over so my back is to me. He wraps an arm around my waist and I fall into endless darkness.

**Well? What do you guys think? I know it's kind of cheesy and the story is kind of dumb but oh well. Give me any ideas you guys have. I keep on forgetting to tell you guys but I made a facebook for this. Just look up **Bita Scull**. Once I remember about it, I'll put sneak peaks up on it and you guys can tell me any ideas or whatever you want. Go ahead and add me! Thank you all! Review please. (: Thanks again to my beta reader: **Cullen-Madness 101_. No problem happy to help :) – Georgie (Cullen-madness101)_


	10. READ! IMPORTANT Rewritting:

I AM SO SORRY! My flash drive erased all the stories plus I moved schools and life has been so hectic. I did not forget about you guys! I'm going to take down all the stories so I can redo all of them once I get all of them copied. Tell me which one you would like to see rewritten first. There is a poll on my profile. I will start as soon as I can! I am so sorry once again. Find me on facebook. Bita Scull, my profile picture is a dog. You can give suggestions and once things calm down there will be sneak peaks! Don't give up on me please(: Best wishes and thank you for sticking with me(:


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